People always say you never forget your first love. But for Jenny Rimmer, it’s her last love that she’ll never forget.
“We met at work, actually,” said Rimmer. “He was my second husband. I loved him so much.”
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You can see the love in her eyes when Rimmer talks about her late husband, David Lee Rimmer.
“He went right out of high school into the Marines and he served four years,” said Rimmer. “Even though he only did the four years, he was so proud of being a Marine. And all of his hats were Marine hats. He was six foot four, so he was a tall, proud Marine. And it affected him his whole life as far as, you know, training and some of the things because he went to Vietnam, as well. And he would wake up with nightmares and thrashing and fighting and so that whole thing was tough on him. But he was just so proud to be a Marine, no matter what, and to get to serve his country.”
Rimmer doesn’t know a lot about David’s time at Camp Lejeune and in the Marines, because by the time they met, he’d been out of the service for about 20 years.
“We met at work. And I started working, after I left my first husband, as a forklift driver for the Walmart distribution center, big warehouse. And he was working there already as a forklift driver,” said Rimmer. “And we just chatted and got to know each other a little bit.”
They met when Rimmer was 33, and David was 42 years old. Rimmer described him as the quintessential Marine—stern, tough, valued hard work, was very handy, and talented at making furniture.
“He had a store, he built wood furniture he brought home,” said Rimmer. “Almost every piece of furniture in my house right now is made from him. He made all of our furniture. He is a perfectionist, everything was, you would never know it was handmade, beautiful, beautiful stuff.”
But David had his softer moments, too.
“He was very loving and very kind and he never had any children of his own,” said Rimmer. “But he helped me with my children and my grandchildren. All they knew was him. Yeah, that was Grandpa. And I’ve got pictures of him laying there because he would look at me say, ‘How did these children love me when they they’re not really mine?’, you know, like, ‘You’re the only grandpa they know.’ And he adored that, loved it.”
Rimmer and David worked at Walmart together for nearly 25 years before his retirement.
“I have a picture, I asked my manager, I said, ‘Can we get two forklifts and park them side by side and let us hold hands and y’all get a picture of us?’ Because that’s where we met, you know,” said Rimmer. “And 25 years later, I got that picture.”
But then David was diagnosed with leukemia, and not long after, doctors discovered he also had liver cancer, which was even worse than his leukemia. David went through treatment and for a little while, it seemed he was going to be okay. So the couple went and bought a brand new fifth wheel camper and were getting ready to go have fun together.
But that never happened.
In January of 2020, David started experiencing pain in his leg and hips.
“COVID had shut everything down. He had to fight his way into the VA to get them to help. He was like, ‘Something’s wrong, something is wrong,’” said Rimmer. “The liver cancer had spread to his bones. And his femur was about to snap in half. It was a big tumor. And it was in his hips, and it was all over him.”
David then proceeded to battle with cancer for about a year and a half.
“His battle to his death was horrific because he was so stubborn. Because he was so proud. He didn’t want me to have to help him do anything. And it got really hard for me. And it was horrible for him because he lost his pride. He lost his dignity,” said Rimmer. “And I mean, all the way to the two weeks before he passed away, he finally agreed to let me put handrails in the shower. He would sit on the side of the tub and use his hands to put his legs over. I mean, I’m talking this man fought to the day he passed away, he did not want me to have to help him do anything. If he fell, which he did several times, he was like, ‘Leave me alone. Leave me alone. I’ve got it.’ And he would crawl and roll around until he could get on his knees. And I mean, it was horrific to watch him fight to keep a little bit of dignity that he had. And that was the hardest part I think of his cancer, was watching his pride be sucked out of him and his dignity. Because he was the proudest man I ever knew.”
David passed away in May of 2021 at 68 years old.
“There was no gray area with David Rimmer. It was either white or black and there was no in between. If he loved you, or if he liked you, you knew it. But if he didn’t like you, you knew it,” said Rimmer. “So a lot of people didn’t like him because he said what he wanted to say. And he meant what he wanted.”
There may have been no gray area, but Rimmer knew she was one of the lucky ones David loved. And he’s still teaching her lessons even today, though he’s gone.
“For many years, he spoiled me rotten. I didn’t have to hardly do any outside work and anything strenuous, he was not going to let me do anything hard,” said Rimmer. “And then later on, when he started getting sick, he started turning. It’s like he started trying to be harder on me and make me tough. And it hurt me at first. And then I started realizing he was doing that for a reason. He knew he was going to leave me, and I needed to know how to do these things by myself. And when you spoil a princess for a long time, and then turn them loose and say, ‘No, you got to do it on your own,’ it hurt. But I can see now he was doing it for me. And I’m very thankful. That was his goal, to make sure that I could survive by myself.”
And Rimmer is surviving, especially now that she has the help of the Camp Lejeune Toxic Water Widows group. She didn’t know a lot about Camp Lejeune before meeting them. She first started to realize there was a connection to David’s illness because when David was sick, he’d gone to the VA on the advice of friends to file for benefits, which he’d never previously done. He found out he was qualified for 100% disability because leukemia is one of the conditions that have been designated as being a presumptive service connection to Camp Lejeune.
“And he was shocked. He had no idea,” said Rimmer.
Now, after his death, Rimmer is just learning about the help and options out there for people affected by the water situation at Camp Lejeune. And she’s doing a lot of it with the help of the group.
“I’m finding that there is help out there. I’m just now starting with this lawsuit,” said Rimmer. “I know to a lot of people, because I didn’t know this was going on until I somehow stumbled on the Facebook group. And so I’m learning through media, social media, and watching what’s going on, and it’s helping me, so I hope this could help somebody. Just to know that we’ve helped somebody that didn’t know they could be helped. And it’s really scary to be a widow, period. When you realize all of a sudden, you’re all by yourself. I mean, I’ve got children, but they’ve got their own lives and it gets so lonely and scary. And that’s what I’m facing now so I’m going to fight for what I got to fight for and make sure that his name is not forgotten.”
It’s that fight that David prepared her so well for.
“He said, ‘You can do it. I don’t like it when you say you can’t. That word is not allowed. You can’t say I can’t, you can,’” said Rimmer. “And he pushed me and pushed me and so it does make me proud. But I think that was my whole goal after he died, I want to make my David proud of me for the things that he struggled to make me tougher than I was. I know he’s watching down and he’s proud of me. That keeps me going.”
