ORLANDO, Fla. – What’s the difference between a bad joke and a dad joke?
The direction the first letter faces.
Recommended Videos
(*ba dum tss*)
The first day of July marks International Joke Day, and dad jokes are the best jokes - even if some consider them anti-jokes.
Here are some dad jokes to help you make someone simultaneously roll their eyes and smile (maybe internally):
1. Why does Waldo wear stripes?
He doesn’t want to be spotted.
2. Why don’t you buy things with Velcro?
It’s a rip-off.
3. Today, my son asked, “Can I have a bookmark?”
I burst into tears — 11 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Brian.
4. Did you hear the rumor about butter?
Well, I’m not going to spread it.
5. Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well!
6. I heard Dracula doesn’t have any friends.
Well, honestly, he is a real pain in the neck.
7. Inflation is really getting out of hand.
But that’s just my five cents.
8. Do I enjoy making courthouse puns?
Guilty.
9. How’s that new glue?
👌
10. Want to hear a pizza joke?
Nevermind, it’s too cheesy!
11. How do you tell the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
You see one later and one in a while.
12. Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days?
They just seem a little shady.
13. The teacher’s eyes were crossed.
He couldn’t control his pupils.
14. Ghosts are such bad liars.
I mean, you can see right through them!
And of course... a classic.
15. What do you call a reindeer with no eyes?
No-eye-deer.